Posts Tagged transformation
Taking the Great Leap of Faith…
Posted by Matt Hoover in General on June 2nd, 2010
About a month ago I got an email from a lady named Jana. She lives in Utah and wrote to ask if we would ever consider working with someone to help them get started down the road to fitness. I am passionate about helping people so I was happy to try and help.
I get several emails a day from people asking for help, but many people aren’t ready to accept help. When I respond to them it is then up to them to follow through. Unfortunately, most people don’t. Many just want to share their feelings and that is it. When Jana responded back, I knew she was serious.
We emailed back and forth a couple of times and came up with a plan. The plan was that she would come to Seattle and work with Suzy and I. I was asking her to make a commitment to us, a financial commitment, a time commitment, and most importantly a time commitment.
Many people are afraid to really commitment. Jana has a husband, 4 boys, one who is Autistic, but she was willing to make a commitment. She is now here this week. She is doing things she never thought she was capable, but most importantly, she is honoring her commitment to herself.
Jana did something huge, she reached out for help and then accepted that help once offered. So many time people talk about what they want to do or are going to do, and then never do anything. We are so proud of her. In just a couple of days we have seen a huge change in her attitude and mind set. Sure she is sore and I would imagine that at times she questions why she decided to come, but the fact is she IS here.
There is nothing more rewarding than seeing a person change their life and to be part of that change. I would love to take credit for what is happening in this woman’s life, but the fact is that SHE is doing it.
Jana has shown this week that it is not enough to go to the precipice of change and stare over the edge. You have to be willing to take that leap and embrace all that making a change has to offer.
What I See When I Look In The Mirror…
Posted by Matt Hoover in General on February 3rd, 2010
There is a strange phenomenon that occurs when you lose weight with someone close to you. When Suzy and I were on the show neither of us really noticed the changes that were happening physically. It seems like when we see a person everyday we are less likely to notice the changes in appearance that are taking place.
It seems like the last person to see the change in us when we lose weight is us. When I got home from the ranch everyone was telling me how good I looked but when I saw myself in the mirror I saw the old me. In the same way that we may not notice a weight loss in a person close to us, the opposite is also true. It may not be immediately obvious when the same person we saw lose the weight starts to gain it back.
After Jax was born Suzy said she was going to take six weeks and then get back to working out. At the six week mark she started working out again. By this time I had gotten pretty lazy. Suzy would ask if I wanted to go for a walk and I would go begrudgingly. When I saw Suzy working out everyday, I didn’t see her as someone who needed to lose weight. I saw her as someone who was suggesting that I needed to lose weight.
There hasn’t been a day that has gone by that I haven’t thought my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world. When she said she was unhappy with her weight I couldn’t figure it out. I seriously thought she was crazy. That is when I realized that I was being an enabler. Not just for my wife, but for myself as well.
By not being supportive of her feelings I was basically telling her that her feelings about herself weren’t valid. By telling her she didn’t have to work out I was giving myself permission to not work out as well. Although I was trying to show her that I loved her “just they way she is” I was doing more harm than good. Of course we love the ones closest to us just the way they are. What are you suppose to do when you love them but they don’t necessarily love themselves?
I’m not saying Suzy didn’t love herself, she didn’t love the way she looked. Not supporting her was like nonverbally saying everyday “It’s fine with me if you aren’t happy just don’t bother me with it because I think you look just fine.” Unfortunately that type thinking was more of a reflection upon myself than it was on my wife.
If I could just get Suzy to be happy with not working out and just carrying some extra weight, maybe I could do the same. It is a little sad but a lot of times in relationships if one person decides they need to make a change the other person takes it personal. As if them wanting to improve themselves somehow means that we are lacking.
For me it was “If Suzy wants to lose weight, she must really mean that she wants me to lose weight.” Oh whoas me! How could she be so selfish as to want something better for herself. There must be something wrong with me. Suzy wanted to be healthy and be an example for our kids like we had talked about since before they were born. I wanted to somehow be healthy but not have to put so much effort into it.
In 14 months my wife had 2 babies and I was the one feeling sorry for myself when I looked in the mirror. Selfishness not only sabatoges the ones we love but ourselves as well. When I finally took a good long look in the mirror I realized that I did in fact need to make some changes. Changes in the way I really saw myself, not how I thought others saw me or how my wife saw me but in the person I saw staring back at me in that mirror everyday.
See you tomorrow!
